Viva La Mexico

As I’m sitting on this plane on my way home, I can’t help but to reflect on the week I just had. Bro, I just came from Mexico, and man was that an experience. I have so many stories I could write, well, a blog post :)

So my sister and I boarded a plane to go to Florida, because we would be leaving from there with my Aunt (who set up and paid for this whole trip because she’s awesome) and my 3 cousins. We stayed in Florida for a night, and prepared to head the Mexico the following morning.

(when in the airport, take snapchat selfies)

So let’s start off with the fact that we thought we were going to Cancun, Mexico. Nuh uh. Turns out the resort was in Puerto Aventuras, Mexico. I mean, I’ve never been there before so it was all the same to me. The resort was really nice. Did I mention it was all inclusive? So we had free food and drinks our entire stay. The plan for the 4 days we would be there was simple: BE LIT AT ALL TIMES. Fun Fact: We all had Spanish names, and mine was Alejandra :)

Okay, lets get to the good stuff.

In the nicest way possible, the food SUCKED. I don’t know if it’s because my family is Jamaican and is all about seasoning up your food and making sure it has flavor, but not en Mexico. I mean, we tried so many different types of foods. Empanadas, burgers, pizza, steak, salmon, shrimp, pasta…all to yield one result. TOILET. Listen, I have never had diarrhea so bad in my life. I feel like I left my intestines in that poor toilet in room 348. It started off just being a joke on Syd. Until my sister and my cousin experienced the very same thing. Let’s just say we finished a bottle of Pepto Bismol in a day. Yikes.

QuarterLifer Epiphany #3: When traveling to foreign countries, make sure you and your stomach are prepared.

One night, we went to one of the most popular clubs in Mexico, Coco Bongo. That was an experience within itself. First off, we got picked up on a bus from the hotel. I knew something was up when there were 70 year olds getting on. Were yall really going to the same place as us? This is how yall give it up en Mexico? Cool cool.

So we thought we were gonna be salsa’ing and merengue’ing all night, and occasionally whining up our waistlines. No sir. I don’t even know how to describe what this was.They played music, and then ever so often, they stopped and it was a whole Broadway production. They performed skits from Chicago, Greece, Beetlejuice…yes…BEETLEJUICE. And no, it wasn’t like they were just on stage. These people were hanging from the ceiling on ropes, doing backflips. My sister and I were laughing at the whole thing, but my two cousins were having the time of their lives. It was an interesting dynamic. Of course, mid party/disco/show, I had to step away and use the bathroom. I feel bad for whoever went in there after me man. It was bad.

So we decided to leave the party earlier than our bus was leaving because we had someplace to be the following morning. We booked an excursion, called “Copa Mayan Encounter” and we were SUPER excited. So we went home, showered, took turns in the bathroom (it’s not funny), took out our clothes for the following day, and went to sleep.

We woke up to a beautiful view of rain. Lots and lots of rain. We were wondering “Are they gonna cancel this trip? Can we postpone and go another day when the weather is better?” Do you think that happened? Nope, the show went on. We got on our bus at 7:45am in our comfy gear. I was ill-prepared man. I didn’t have running sneakers. I had Comme des Garcon converses. If you know anything about converses, you know those are not the type of sneakers that will be comfy for an adventurous trip. But I had no choice, so off I went.

R.I.P. to my lil babies

So it took an hour to get where we needed to get, and of course we slept on the bus. Woke up, and it was a hurricane. Yes, the rain got worse. I was just looking at my family like “Are we really about to do all these nature activities and its Hurricane Pablo outside?” Our tour guide must have been in another world, because when we asked him for rain coats, he was appalled. Oh, and he didn’t wear one. He had on a long sleeve shirt, shorts, and chancletas. In a hurricane. I didn’t even really know where we were going until we were there. We were in a jungle.

My good friends, long story short, we hiked through a Mayan Jungle. I mean, we were stepping in puddles up to our knees, my sister was stepping on frogs, we were dipping and dodging tree branches, being yelled at saying “DON’T TOUCH THE TREES”. So we get to our first activity, and it was canoeing. You ever got told to hop in a canoe and and meet upon the other side of the jungle, while it was pouring rain, and you never canoed in your life? K. Needless to say, my very black family and I looked at the tour guide and told him "no gracias". We were not hopping on 5feet long boats and stroking a paddle in the river while there was a whole monsoon happening. So we hiked to where all the nature-savvy white people ended up, and proceeded to do an activity I’ve always wanted to do…ZIP LINING. It was AMAZING. Ziplining over a deep ass body of water while hard raindrops are hitting you in your face and you don’t know if the string is going to pop and you fall to your death or not. What an experience. The next activity was cave diving. My cousins did that, while my sister and I held our aching stomachs. Finally, we took a tour. We got in these bikes where we sat in the front, and had a guide peddle us through the jungle while sitting behind us. This part was pretty great. And yes, it was still raining. We saw the various Mayan monuments, including the Mayan Temple. And we climbed it. All the way to the top. It was scary, but it was such a great feeling to make it to the top and see that amazing view.

We were then served lunch from Mayan women, made specially for us. It wasn’t my mama’s cooking, but I had to eat. So I chose the most simple things; chicken and rice. After such a long day, we headed back to the hotel. What a freaking day!

So many things happened in these 4 days in Mexico. We drank lots of drinks, and never got drunk because they were weak. We went shopping in another part of Mexico, Playa Del Carmen, where we bought a bunch of souvenirs for our loved ones (and ourselves). We ate a Mexican buffet style meal on the beach while watching a performance about Mexican culture. We played volleyball on the beach & went in the pool and Jacuzzi a bunch of times. We ordered room service every night just because we can. We danced our little hearts away every day in our room. We denied water every time we were asked “Agua?”, because water in mexico es no bueno. Did I tell you guys im officially bilingual now? I was our translator the entire trip! And everyone was saying my pronunciation is A1. I guess all those years of halfway paying attention in Spanish class worked! We took pictures, made videos, and enjoyed quality time together. I had an amazing trip. Thank you Aunty Carla.

When I get home, I’m changing my lifestyle around. I feel like my body needs to be cleansed, so tomorrow, after I get my DREADED hair done (literally. My weave is so knotted, it’s turning into dreads). I’m going to buy groceries so that I can start juicing and detoxing. I can’t wait to start that journey officially. I’ll also start going to the gym again, because I stopped after my booty started growing. But hello, it’s going away and I need it to come back!

Anyway, got another stamp on my passport, my stomach is calmed down, im tanned and hoping it stays forever, and all is well in the world. Till next time.